Who speaks for survivors?
The Catholic Church has often been described as a cult by critics. In fact, most of the cult checklists out there seem directly targeted at Rome, even if aimed at Mormons, Scientologists, or Heaven’s Gate. But there is another group that exhibits many of the same disturbingly cult-like features of the Catholic Church, even though (or perhaps because) it is supposedly run by and for victims and survivors of Catholic clergy sexual abuse.
Does this resemble any group claiming to represent victims that you know? Consider the following traits (emphasis added), and the answer is below:
- The group has a firm hierarchical structure and is led by one person or a small group of people who rule absolutely.
- The leader or leading body is not accountable to anyone (on earth).
- The leaders claim to have a special mission.
- The group has a clear view of their enemy.
- The leaders direct admiration, reverence and maybe even worship to themselves.
- The group exerts a total control over its members. Thinking and behavior in everyday matters is prescribed.
- The group applies a double standard (behaves differently towards their own group and towards outsiders).
- The group portrays itself as something new and exclusive or as the only true version of a larger religion.
- The teachings of the group are (at least in part) not open to the public but only to members or even only to some inner or advanced circle.
- New members are introduced to the teachings only gradually.
- There is a discrepancy between the way the group presents itself to the public and the way it is seen by neutral outsiders.
Of course, there are “cults” and then there are cults. I’m certainly not claiming that this particular group is on some kind of weird Jim Jones trip or that strange shenanigans of any kind are going on among them. Against the classic ABCDEF Cult Checklist by the late Isaac Bonewits, their rankings would be quite boringly and consistently low.
But I do think any honest appraisal of the points posted above and the group of which I write would illustrate that it operates with a closed, secretive, elitist attitude encased within a siege mentality very much like that of the Roman Catholic Church. Sure, the condition’s as understandable as it is regrettable; it’s almost impossible to escape infection when the Church screwed with us all so badly in both body and soul. Likewise, in battle, one naturally tends to mirror the enemy one engages. So perhaps it’s inevitable to some degree.
However, I do not think this is the best way to oppose the Church. You don’t fight a death cult by imitation – you fight it with openness, acceptance, truth, love, and even joy. Well, maybe that’s the problem, because we’ve known so little of those things, but the principle is still valid, I think.
In any event, the kind of power-hoarding behavior we’re seeing in this group, though, in my opinion does not support survivors, protect children, or hold the Church accountable. It is, in fact, the very antithesis of the democratic openness, transparency, and accountability that a truly mature and healthy advocacy group would show.
And frankly, this is one survivor who is damned tired of it.
I’m sick of these people claiming to speak for survivors. We each speak for ourselves. I never authorized them to speak for me – did you?
I’m sick of them claiming they’ve done so much to hold the Church accountable when all I see is ambulance-chasing, showboating, and grandstanding, and often long after the fact.
I’m sick of the same small group appearing in the pictures of their press conferences like they’re putting it to the Man when it’s just those few and a couple of reporters who show up who buy into the idea that they speak for us.
I’m sick of them claiming they are supporting survivors with local meetings. Really? Where? The only times I’ve ever been informed of a local meeting here were twice when they were looking for help with a publicity stunt. Hell, I ran my own 12-step-based support group for years and not a single one of them ever showed up.
I’m sick of them stealing others’ ideas, doing a half-assed job, and then claiming credit like it was a big success.
I’m sick of them making us all look like strident, irrational, money-grubbing golddiggers.
I’m sick of them irritating the faithful by picketing churches during services when it’s the Corporate Church that needs confrontation.
I’m sick of them claiming how survivors are coming out of the woodwork in droves to tell them their stories. Where? When? I’ve seen no evidence, just claims in their begging letters.
I’m sick of them shutting out people with creative ideas or ignoring the efforts of those who only want to help.
I’m sick of their secrecy, using information as power just like the Church.
I’m sick of them going after non-clerical offenders or getting involved in situations not directly concerned with clergy abuse, apparently just for publicity.
I’m sick of their dunning impoverished survivors. It’s not us poor victims who should be giving – where’s the money from the bloody lawyers who made millions off of our suffering, and how about contributions from those whom they’ve won millions for? If they have been giving all along, why’s it kept secret?
Now, I haven’t named this group so far because I suspect everybody reading this has figured out already what group this is. If you can tell who I’m talking about without my naming anyone, then maybe what I say just might not be that far off the mark.
And yes, you guessed it. I’m sorry that the stinkin’ thinkin’ I smell is coming from the “Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests”: SNAP.
Frankly, if SNAP does go down from the mistakes of its leaders, it won’t be the end of the Survivors Movement. Between these folks and Rome, I’m afraid that’s pretty much cold and stiff in the ground already, but maybe we’ll finally get some answers. And maybe the media will then finally pay attention to more worthy efforts that are doing real work but are not grubbing in the dirt for publicity, like Bishop Accountability.
I don’t expect that to happen. In fact, I expect that this post will only
- gather hate mail from survivors who think I’m heartlessly bashing their sole hope and
- be as pointedly ignored by members of SNAP as everything I write.
Which only goes to prove it, sigh. Well, let the flaming begin!