Welcome!
This site belongs to Jay Nelson, a writer and artist, former priest in an Independent Catholic church, one-time mad monk in a medieval recreation society. Oh, and I’m a survivor of clergy sexual abuse in the Roman Catholic Church, too, and an activist for survivor issues.
Despite my intense programming as a child, I fled the dogmatic prison of the Church of Rome as a young adult long before I realized I had been sexually molested while serving at the altar. But the “call” would not go away. For several decades thereafter, I played a leading local religious persona in a local medieval recreation society. So I’ve not only administered the sacraments “for real”, I’ve anointed kings, cursed them, created relics, and sold indulgences, too. Funny thing about my blessings, they seemed to work exactly the opposite from the way intended…
Though an unexcelled real-world education in how religion actually works, just playing at priest was not enough for me. But my prayers to find a liberal church where I could I pursue my spiritual interests without sacrificing my intellectual freedom were ultimately answered. I “went legit” in 1991, when I was ordained in the Catholic Apostolic Church of Antioch. Made it up to the rank of Archpriest, too, before I quit.
Less than a year after my ordination, on Good Friday in 1992, no less, I first realized I had been a spectacularly “unlucky” altar boy, who had been ritualistically abused by a parish priest for years. Sure didn’t see that one coming…
Recovery has been a lengthy, tearful, and difficult struggle, an unending task. Survival thus far has been due to good therapists, the unwavering support of my family, friends, and church, and the inspiration of countless other victims and survivors. Plus, of course, the mysterious grace of God, whatever that means.
The discovery completely overturned my life, and my efforts to found a parish soon withered. My main focus turned to clergy abuse activism. I participated in local protests and even led the only group of victims to demonstrate at World Youth Day in 1993 — 5 against 500,000.
For over a decade, I published both the newsletter and website for The Survivors of Clergy Abuse Linkup (now long gone), at the time the leading clergy abuse victim support and advocacy organizations in the US. Most of the articles I wrote then, plus historical “smoking gun” documents and much else, I’ve republished on my Priests of Darkness website.
Many of them — along with nineteenth century academic histories, Church decrees, and much else — form the basis of my recently self-published exposé, SONS OF PERDITION: New Mexico in the History of the Catholic Sex Scandals.
I’ve also written a novel: The Harrowing, a psychological horror tale about a survivor struggling against a diabolical cult in the Southwest. Personally therapeutic even if universally ignored. And I’ve also completed a much deliberately funnier work, a movie script for a dark medieval comedy, Once Upon An Inquisition. I hope to base a novel on it soon.
I’ve been a professional graphic designer, albeit a mediocre but inspired painter, an essayist, and have even had a few mystical experiences as well. At my own request, I’ve been voluntarily granted a full and complete excommunication from the Roman Catholic Church. Perhaps their willingness was due to my being ordained in a church they deem heretical had something to do with. I retired as a priest to better concentrate on clergy abuse survivor issues, as well as to spare them any repercussions from making fun of the pope.
Now I have no such limitations, and I intend to make full use of the freedom here.
In the meantime, as my patron saint did, I continue to wait in the desert for the Last Trump with my cats.
Thanks for coming by. Go in peace.
The Most Irreverend Jay Nelson
(Formerly Very Reverend J. Nelson, AA, BA, LST, (ret.)
a/k/a Master Hieronymus the Sarabite, AA, OWS, OL, Primate of the Outlands, Abbot of Wormwood Abbey)