SurvivorLink Mailing List

This private mailing list is intended for sharing news and views of victims and survivors of sexual abuse by clergy. It is owned by Jay Nelson and administered by chosen volunteers.

This is a successor to an email list which itself is a successor to the old Linkup list, hence the name.

Membership

  1. Members are invited to join. No one may subscribe themselves, but they are free to unsubscribe themselves at any moment. To join, people may request admission from the list admins or be recommended by another member.
  2. As a private list, messages are sent out only to subscribed members, and only members may contribute or comment.
  3. Some members may want to use a different address to further disguise their identity. If so, you will have to contact the list admins with the new address before you can join in.
  4. Please notify the list admins off-list whenever you will be away or unable to receive messages for a period of time so you can be put on vacation status. That way, you can still post while away, but your mailbox won’t become cluttered.

Discussions

  1. We strive to keep this list private and safe. However, note that the nature of the Internet allows anything posted to remain in circulation indefinitely and copies of your private messages can ultimately wind up anywhere. Therefore, always use discretion when posting.
  2. This list is monitored by the list admins but will not be moderated unless necessary.
  3. Free expression is encouraged; however, flaming or insulting behavior towards other list members will not be tolerated. This may also include private e-mails between individuals sent off this list server. Respect and courtesy to fellow survivors is absolutely necessary for this list to continue. Even though anger can be a healthy emotion, it can also be destructive. Therefore, we are more than asking members, we are requiring members to not insult, denigrate or intimidate fellow list members for any reason.
  4. As this is a mailing list for victims of trauma in recovery, strong emotions, opinions, and frank language may be expressed and should be expected. Every member is expected to take responsibility for his or her actions and sayings - including being triggered by another member.
  5. Respect for the deeply held spiritual beliefs of members is important. Church-bashing and sharp criticism of humans and institutions is inevitable, but some sensitivity to the faith or lack of faith of other list members should be shown, no matter how foolish it may seem to you.
  6. Sharing of spiritual experiences and life stories is also encouraged; however, preaching is not. Use “I” statements when speaking of your faith and don’t get pushy, and you should be fine.
  7. Topics discussed should relate somehow to clergy abuse. Anything really off topic should be indicated somehow in the Subject line. This includes all jokes.
  8. Mundane political discussions are strongly discouraged. Church politics, however, remains fair game.
  9. Individuals who are having a hard time being polite may be individually moderated for a time, until it is clear that they are improving. If they cannot or will not change, they will be forcefully unsubscribed and permanently banned from the list. After which, no second chances or appeals will be granted.
  10. The list admins reserve the right to unsubscribe and permanently ban any individual for any reason whatsoever and without reason. However, the administrators, who have a long track record of being fair, will be thoughtful in making any such severe decision; the guiding purpose always being to preserve the healthy integrity of the listmembership and a “safe” environment to exchange views and opinions. Any such decision will reflect the group conscience of the admins and input from other members will probably be requested before any final judgment is reached.
  11. There is no obligation to read or respond to everything or anything. If someone’s postings generally annoy you, feel free to ignore or even filter messages from them out before reading.
  12. For privacy’s sake, please limit your postings on topics discussed here to this forum. If you wish to include outsiders in the conversation, email them separately or invite them to join the list. Do not Bcc (Blind Carbon Copy) to the list, or have any other recipients in the To or Cc (Carbon Copy) fields; such messages will automatically be rejected.
  13. Please address all complaints and suggestions off list, directly to the owner and list admins. Thanks.

Posting

  1. Since irony and sarcasm are sometimes exceedingly difficult to detect in text, the use of smileys or emoticons, such as :) are strongly encouraged.
  2. Please remember that in emails, USE OF ALL CAPS IS LIKE SHOUTING. Use them infrequently for emphasis or not at all.
  3. Due to space limitations of some members’ mailboxes, please do not post large files, such as large photos or pdfs and very long stories. It’s best to post introductory quotes from and links to news items plus your comments, rather than the entire article. If you must send the whole article, good practice is to copy and paste from the “Print” version, to avoid extraneous links and other matter. Also always send the link to the original story.
  4. Not everyone has a mail reader that can read messages in Web page format. Therefore, it is considerate to post in “plain text” format, or at least do not use complicated color, sizes and fonts to make your points in your messages.
  5. Snipping out irrelevant sections of quoted text is greatly encouraged. Generally speaking, only the message being directly replied to should be included, not the entire thread. Also PLEASE delete the automatic headers and footers in quotes – we just want the meat of the discussion.
  6. Unlike many forums, we prefer that people write their comments ABOVE quoted text rather than below, so others do not have to wade through long discussions to get to new comments.
  7. Enjoy your time here and don’t be shy. You’re among friends, most of whom share similar experiences and are struggling with their own recovery along their spiritual journey. Think of this as a survivors conference without walls.
    :)

Interested?

Contact Jay for more information, or to request membership.

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